second to last man standing
Member for 3y & 4mon
February 12, 2017 5:46pm
I've thought about this a lot. The way I see it, if you're holding angry feelings about another person it means you have a problem with them and there are three options for it: you could hold inside, which will lead to the need to vent or talk about it behind that persons back; you could discuss with them and see if it's something they would be willing to change; or, if it's a small enough issue, let it go. Most people normally take the first option.
Let me tell you, the worst feeling a person can get is when someone they admire, or even just someone they can hang around is talking bad about them behind their back. If they figure out about it they'll lose trust in just about everything; it's pretty much the number 1 cause of suicide. And believe me, it's nearly impossible for them not to figure it out. People who've never met the person will know all of their flaws and none of the good things about them, because that's all that they'll listen to, and the person will eventually figure out why.
As for the people who were told about them, they'll only know their flaws, so any chance of them actually meeting this person without an already existing negative opinion is completely gone, so they never get the chance to make a good first impression.
as for telling no one and just venting to yourself, you get better at what you practice, and that's practicing seeing the negative in people. If you do that you'll always only see the bad in people.
People are flawed, and they'll always make mistakes, or even have serious personality issues, but I haven't met a single person who didn't have overwhelming positives about them that completely outshine the negatives. It's always damaging to nitpick the bad in someone, and it will always lead to other people nitpicking the bad in you. It's just not worth it to start, for everyone's sake <=3
Sorry about the essay, this is something I feel pretty strongly about