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> Jay: Answer friend.

vulpineSpark [VS] began pestering terseNarcissist [TN] at 21:57.
VS: I don't remember teeth on PM, what panel is that from
TN: Omg you're reading it
TN: Last time I remembered you weren't reading hahaha
TN: It's one of the newest ones
VS: ...ah, yeah. 8D;;; Last week people were talking about it so I figured I should pick up where I left off and now I regret stopping where I did, because I kinda stopped right before the tricksters and I missed out on all of that
VS: and it blew me away
VS: ohh hmm
VS: where they're chasing the godcat?
TN: Yeah you said you were afraid of the fans?
TN: Haha
VS: yeah, some of the fans, the really crazy ones 8| but I'm starting to see why
TN: Yeahthewholewebcomic'skindofcrazyonitsown
VS: xD yeah
VS: Oh, also, your tumblr helped me I think. :D
VS: helped me to become interested again I mean
TN: Pfft oh really? I'm flattered then hahaha I thought it would put people off
VS: xD I don't remember if it came from you, but it was something about the alpha kids when they hit god tier? That got my attention because I kinda ignored Roxy before, so I figured I should read through again
TN: Huuuuh
TN: I reblog all the random shits hahhahah Roxy
TN: Why would you ignore her omg she's the best <3
TN: By best I mean the most sensible one
VS: have no idea how I missed all her parts but yeah she's awesome
TN: but favorite was grimbark Jade (before she got squished, I mean)
TN: It's okay they can't kill Jade
TN: (forever, anyway)
VS: xD yeah
VS: ...hopefully >> <<;;
TN: Naw
TN:They showed her with Calliope

> Jay: Check in with the others.
Time to get a move on. You can talk about tangentially related webcomics later.

TN: Oh yeah, anyone heard from Britt yet?
LL: Nope :(
LL: I'm sure she's still grinding somewhere though!
TN: Damn
TN: I've still got my hands full so I can't handle that thing
TN: Maybe we should just
TN: bring in another friend
LL: Oh?

> Jay: Recruit a new player.

Normally you wouldn't bother with this crap, but hey, a workload is a workload. Even if the workload comes from a school that should, technically speaking, have long been obliterated by meteors. You guess you'll have to find a new player to pick up the slack.

You also wouldn't normally do this because there aren't really a lot of good candidates. But there is one fellow who might be interested. Someone who you thought was uninterested in this sort of thing until recently...
...
...
...
Who's this guy?

> Enter name.
Melonfruity Bearsnack?
No. Just no.

> Try again.

Your name is STEVEN. You have an unrivaled passion for writing OTHERWORLDLY FANFICTIONS, which often involve CATACLYSMIC REBIRTH of the source material's universe. And by otherworldly, you of course mean the Pokemon world. You also have a particular fondness for VULPINES and FICTIONAL ELECTRIC ANIMALS, especially when they are varieties of Pokemon. The electric animals, you mean. You adore all foxes equally.

You used to enjoy HIKING in the CHAPARRAL, but eventually lost interest because you have a strong aversion to INVERTERBRATE LIFE-FORMS. You really can't stand those things. Nonetheless, you still retain a certain fondness for the wilderness, and it sometimes resurfaces in your stories.

You also detest Wal-Mart. You have no personal bias against the HYPER-MONOPOLY CORPORATION that you definitely know has infected every corner of the world from Afghanistan to Zimbabwe even though you rarely ever leave your house, but you once read a book about a company that took over the world and it scared you. This definitely qualifies you to make that sort of judgement.

You are also a MODERATOR on the OTHERWORLDLY COMMUNITY of ROUTE 50, which you consider a PEACEFUL ABODE from where you start various CYBERSPATIAL EXPLOITS. Despite your RECURRENT PARANOIA, you are well-respected in your community. At least, you think you are. You never know who might be after your head on a plate.

> Examine posters.

There are no posters! Unlike many of your friends, you did not collect much paraphernalia to advertise your interests when you were younger. Really, it all just seemed like a waste of money to you. Your interests will change in a few years and then you'll have to find new posters, shoes, etc... Okay, maybe you're just lazy as fuck and don't get outside enough.

Wait. What's that behind the shutters?

> Examine the only poster hidden behind the shutters.

Oh. Right. You forgot you even had this. It was a free promotional poster for POKEMON COLOSSEUM, advertising the distribution of the legendary WISH MAKER Pokemon, JIRACHI. That was many years ago, though. Your interests have changed a lot over the years.

> Retrieve arms from dresser.

Your SWISS ARMY KNIFE is not a weapon to arm yourself with!!! As you were told repeatedly in the BOY SCOUTS, it is a tool with which comes the UTMOST RESPONSIBILITY of safety and caution. You have never used it on a living thing--human, animal, or vegetable.

By the way, a friend is pestering you. You probably didn't notice because you got distracted. Again.

> Steven: Answer friend.

terseNarcissist [TN] began pestering vulpineSpark [VS] at 8:43
TN: hithere
VN: Hi :D
TN: SO uh you saw the session preview, right
VS: Yeah
VS: was thinking about your offer, actually
VS: might even take you up on it
TN: Oh?
TN: If you want to join us here, that's cool
TN: if not, that's cool too
VS: how much time do I have though?
VS: Sounds as if there's not a whole lot of room
TN: Probably not that long, hahahha
TN: But hey now, don't feel pressured :3
TN: But you
VS: Yeah, about that xD
VS: living sounds better than not
VS: time to start downloading xD
VS: wait, who's my server?
TN: Uh
TN: Hang on
TN: I'd better go talk with the others
TN: Things work a little differently than in the comic sooo yeah
TN: Like okay so you can sorta influence your god tier and planet more and stuff

> Jay: Open memo.

terseNarcissist [TN] opened a new memo on board mIrAcLeS.
TN: HELLO FRIENDS
TN: Welcome new friend yes because the more the merrier the more victims yes
TN: I mean friends
vulpineSpark [VS] replied to memo.
VS: xD
VS: whee death this looks like fun
TN: so do you know your God Tier?
VS: I think I'm a rogue
VS: wait, are they online //confused
DraKeithy [DK] replied to memo.
DK: i'm online I'm just
DK: hi im keith
VS: Ah hello there
TN: Oh yeah
TN: Right intros
TN: I forget things like that
TN: HI this is
TN: I forget did I ever catch your name OTL I keep staring at this sparkofleaves and
TN: Wow this is stupid I'm dumb oTL
VS: ???
VS: mostly I go by Sparkleaf
VS: or SparkofLeaves

> Jay: Explain.

Yeah, the new guy will take some coaching, but it's okay. You've given this tutorial at least three or four times already.
TN: huuuuummm
TN: no no we just use real / nicknames here
VS: ???
TN: SO i forget if we ever caught each other's names
VS: what do you mean
VS: OH
TN: like Jay
TN: I'm Jay
VS: Steven
TN: LIKE STEVEN STONE /sparkly eyes
VS: xD
VS: best champion ever >> << //jk
TN: no he is shhh
VS: yes yes he is
TN: better than wallace by a tidal wave
TN: badpun
VS: xD but good pun
TN: meeeeeeeeeeh but yeah we probably gotta get it set up but Steven is a cool name
TN: okay Jay stfu stop being distracted
VS: Jay is a pretty cool name too :U
TN: naaah it's my nickname, my real name's Jasmine but it's so common and eeeeerugh

> Steven: Introduce yourself to your fellow players.

You don't mind that you're getting to know new people. So far they're pretty nice.
VS: ah sorry I'm new to this
VS: I'm Steven?
TS: Nah 's cool like STEVEN STONE
TS: KEITH
DK: OMG
TS: OMG YES
DK: EVERYONE IS HAPPY NOW YES wellIamsoyeah
TN: But yes I'll try to get some shit done before spamming you all with this shit
TN: sorry about this pals I'm on two computers at the same time
psyduckSigh [PS] replied to memo.
PS: (oh gosh sorry - hello new friend! i'm rachel, it's nice to meet ya!)
PS: (i'm just popping in for a bit to say hi and then i gotta go but yeah hiya!)
VS: Hello, nice to meet you, I'm Steven ^^

> Jay: Settle things privately.
Things will get hectic if you stay in the group chat. You switch back to the private chat with Steven.

VS: So, um
VS: How do I influence my role in the session?
TN: It's complicated
TN: Lemme send you the program

terseNarcissist has sent vulpineSpark OverseerProject.exe.

TN: Hmm yeah in a way I suppose but
TN: then again it also depends on your strife specibus
TN: what we all currently have is
TN: ninjakind, broomkind, clubkind, sciencekind, spearkind, and artkind
TN: if I am not mistaken
TN: Also if you change your name to steven stone I will love you forever
VS: xDDD
VS: most of my other friends would probably be confused
VS: also scared to be in the prescence of
VS: steven stone

> Steven: Check specibus.
Much as you hate to admit it, your swiss army knife is equipped under knifekind, not toolkind as recommended by the Boy Scouts. This isn't your original strife specibus, of course. You prefer lances, so naturally, you once had the spearkind specibus.

You got this one from your brother, who enjoyed playing with knives. A lot. You've never really used your knife as a weapon, though, except to whittle sharpened sticks. Too bad you don't have a stickkind specibus, huh?

Let's get back to influencing your session. What's the next step?

VS: where is a handy chooser-wheel-thing when you need one
TN: no shh we need to do it canonically
TN: which is what suits you best
TN: What about
TN: Light?
VS: hmm
VS: sure
VS: Rogue of Light
TN: or hope
VS: hope is weird
TN: wait are you reading that post
VS: yeah
TN: :33
TN: Is it now hmm
TN: Not time or space?
VS: hm
VS: okay I'll be the space player :U
TN: I refuse to let you be the whatever player unless it fits you 8U
VS: Light seemed interesting but the part about Calliope hit kinda home <_< >_>
TN: Because I am a perfectionist and I don't like people ha-
TN: PFFT
VS: fanfic writers gotta stick together //jk
VS: hm
TN: Pfft
VS: time and hope are definitely out though

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